Have I ever mentioned how much I loathe team building exercises? Not the real one, no. The ones that take cut-throat competition and slap a happy veneer over it to call it team building?
I squinted through the sunlight, trying to see where Sue was in the obstacle course. It was one of those big inflatable things that look like some swim float on steroids. She was struggling through inflatable tire rings about halfway through the maze. Meanwhile our opponents, from accounting, were just clearing the exit with their second to last man. And I was standing helplessly at the starting line, waiting for Sue to reach me so I could take my turn in the inflatable torture chamber.
The referee (okay the high school kid overseeing our event) came up to us and asked Monica how many were left to go on our team. She turned to look at Mr. Huggle . He looked over at me and then back at the ref, "Just him." I looked at Mr. Huggle in confusion. He was the anchor, he'd called it at the start of the event and as the boss, he got it. He looked at me and gave a short shake of his head, the meaning unmistakable.
And then I didn't have anymore time to react. Sue was running towards me. No matter what, I needed to do my personal best…
I walked into the air conditioning of the sports center's cafeteria. I made a beeline for the coolers full of beverages and yanked a bright blue sports drink from the ice. Putting the bottle to my neck I let its cold wash through me as I closed my eyes and tried to let go. Mr. Huggle had never run the obstacle course and because I'd run my heart out, we'd "beaten" accounting and "won" the obstacle course.
Yet, in the end it hadn't mattered. They had already trounced us in the soccer shoot-out and then went on to annihilate us in ultimate Frisbee. So in the end, accounting won the overall competition and all I had for my experience was a lingering unease and a sweaty t-shirt.
Finally I gave a shrug and took a long pull from the sports drink. I had to let it go. It's not like it was a big deal and we didn't win anyway. So what if Huggle cheated?
<Clunk… Slide…. Clunk… Slide…>
Fearful of what the sound could be, but knowing full well what it was, I turned towards the door. He was silhouetted in the sunlight, his black form even more indistinguishable than normal. He was moving strangely, a waddling shuffle, almost like he was wearing…
"Hogarth! Why are wearing skis?"
Hogarth shuffled across the room his skis knocking over a couple of chairs the process. Plucking a banana from a fruit bowl and taking a bite from the unpeeled banana he chewed on it thoughtfully for several seconds. Finally, just as my patience was about to boil over, he turned to me and said. "To go down the slippery slope of course."
"What slippery slope? It hasn't rained in weeks!"
My gorilla gave a shrug. "The slippery slope that starts with fudging a team building game and ends with a Bernie Madoff sized Ponzie scheme."
I threw my hands in the air in disgust. Stomping to a chair, I flung myself down and took a long pull on my sports drink. "Hogarth, it's not the same. It's light years difference between the two."
Hogarth nodded, "You're right, the difference is vast. And you're wrong, it is the same. That's your problem."
"Huh?"
My gorilla looked me right in the eyes and spoke. "There is no such thing as black and white only shades of grey. The secret is knowing that and always questioning what you do. If you're always checking to see if you're off course, you'll get back on course a lot faster."
Ethics- In this post Lehmans, Enron, Madoff era you can't go a week without some kind of news article about ethics. Whether it is decrying a lack of it, tips for being better, passionate arguments for the use of it or even unethical advice on how to fake it, ethics has become a major component of our professional lives. This isn't the three martini Mad Men era of business (if that ever really existed) where anything goes to close a deal. This is the era of the always online internet where what you said ten years ago is still floating around on some Alexa server. PMI has made ethics an integral part of its certification process, as had many professional organizations.
We all know it is right to be ethical, we all know what it means. Google summed it up in their corporate motto "Don't be evil."
Hey, Google! How's that working out for you?
The world has become a lot murkier in the 21st century. The clean and crisp lines that had Superman as good and Lex Luthor as evil have given way to hero's like the Dark Knight and villains the Libyans throwing off their "legal" government.
Where is the line now? If there is not black and white, then how do we know if we're on ethical ground or a quicksand pit of corporate malfeasance?
Unfortunately, I don't think there are any magic bullet on this. In the example above, you risk the wrath of your employer if you point out he's cheating in a simple game. Is it unethical to stay quiet? At the other end of the spectrum, if your boss is embezzling seven figure amounts from the company, it's pretty clear cut that you should do something.
But those examples are like night and day!
Yes they are. The question is, what's the difference between night and day? The answer is about one minute.
There isn't a magic formula to tell you when you've gone from skating the edge to full on breach of ethics.
The secret is to always be asking yourself if you've crossed that line. Just as the courageous man is a man that knows fear but does it anyway, an ethical person is one who is constantly examining their own actions.
At the end of the day, there is only one person who can tell you if you're being ethical or not.
Look in the mirror.
Joel Bancroft-Connors
The Gorilla Talker
Want me to talk to your gorilla? mailto:jbancroftconnors@gmail.com
You can follow me on twitter, @JBC_PMP
Who is Hogarth? Read Blog 001 to find out all about my personal gorilla.
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